The First Time I Had Sex
He took off my
tank top, then bra
Pried open the
zipper of my cropped pants
And peeled my
knickers layer by layer with his teeth
Till I stood
naked, embarrassed.
When he suckled
my breasts,
I imagined him
drinking from the bowl of my heart.
I loved him,
but words are nothing
Deeds mean
everything –
I was doing it
for love.
Between my legs
he was hard and full.
I lifted my
legs, created a cradle for him
Then said:
Don’t. Stop.
He heard don’t
stop.
He lost himself
in me, stretching, hurting me
Breaking bonds.
I magically yielded.
Sweet.
My body broke
to pieces, and scattered.
Rain fell, a
benediction.
This is how sex is?
He was smiling,
glowing –
I felt
horrible, empty.
Evelyn, what have you done? I heard the voice of God.
“We didn’t do
anything wrong,” Alex said.
You don’t do things that’re wrong, I told myself, because of
love.
His heat seeped
through my thighs.
We were not
going anywhere together –
The sound of my
heart breaking was the loudest.
The serpent lied to me, I told God
And I ate the apples…
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